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    The Pursuit of Happiness

    7 things i’ve learnt in 2017 so far: 6 month review.

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    We’re halfway through 2017, I’ve handled things I didn’t think I could. I’ve grown as a woman and accepted things for what they are. I’ve let go of many negative patterns and toxic people and replaced them with positive routines and self care practices.

    This year has tested me in many ways but I have learnt to ride the waves rather than resist them.

    1. Letting go of what does not serve me. Clearing out what no longer serves me. Listening to myself and not settling.
    2. Creating and sustaining a solid self-care practice:  Right now my routine includes… morning meditation, morning work outs, taking baths daily, reading before bed time, and taking time to myself when I need it. If you would like me to do a full post on my new routine let me know in the comments section.
    3. Trusting myself. I have finally learnt to trust my instincts. Learning to make a decision and know that whatever I decide is right for me without second guessing it.
    4. Getting my money right. I have finally paid off my student loan, opened up a house savings account, and I am feeling a lot more positive towards my finances. I usually spend money on travel as this has been my priority. And although it still is, i realise i have to get other financial priorities in check too.
    5. It’s okay not to know where your going.  Learning to trust the process and trust the timing of my life. Letting go of the past, I am realising better days are coming if i just learn to let go of fear.
    6. Letting go of fear and self doubt. Not letting fear drive my choices, or dictating my life. Not allowing fear to become part of the stories that make up my life.
    7. The Universe has my back. My relationship with the universe and spirituality has taken a strong turn, and I am really delving into this world. I have always been a bit reluctant towards this part of me – and brushed it off as a bit ‘woo woo’ but the more i delve into it, the more in tune with myself i feel.

    The first half of 2017 has seen a huge shift for me that has changed my life in an extreme but incredibly needed way. It has really shone a light on all aspects of my life that i needed to improve. I feel better than I have in what feels like forever. Like the alchemist i feel like i’ve finally learnt how to turn sh*t into gold.

    What has the first 6 months of the year felt like for you? Let me know!

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    Twitter: Hayley_Colleen 

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    Blogging guide 101

    FIND YOUR BLOGGING NICHE Passion, Demand, and Earning Potential

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    Choose Something You Know and Love

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    This is so, so important. You need be consistent with your blog and your writing, there’s a lot that goes into a blog including photography, marketing, editing and managing multiple social media platforms, you will only want to keep up with blogging if you are passionate about the subject you are writing about. Don’t just start a a  blog to earn money as it will take YEARS until you are earning a large amount. Follow your passion rather than money.

    Ask yourself these questions:

    • Why do I read the blogs I read? What do they do well that draws me in and keeps me coming back? Chances are if your reading blogs on a particular subject that should highlight your interests and guide you on what kind of content you want. For example, if your always reading beauty blogs – beauty’s the  one!
    • What is something that no one out there is doing? Why? – Here’s the difficult part, if I use beauty as an example there are SO many beauty bloggers. So try and find a different angle on the content. Has this idea been done before? Is this niche saturated? If so, how could you do this differently?
    • Who do you want to help? Always think about your audience if you want to retain them as consistent readers – this is really important  as you need to be adding value to keep your readers coming back.

    Monetizing and finding a gap in the Market

    The bad news? The blogging market is saturated. The good news? Every industry is. As i keep repeating do not start a blog purely to earn money, you won’t last. It isn’t easy to earn money in this industry, but importantly, it is possible. It’s hard to get into any worthwhile industry. Do you  realise how hard it is to be a lawyer? A dancer? An athlete? Everything worth having doesn’t come easy.

    So now you have hopefully picked your niche, lets delve into how you can get that moneyyy!

    There our multiple ways to monetize your blog, i have’t delved into this yet, but as I work in digital marketing i know well how these works, and they do and CAN work if you work hard enough:

    TOP 5 WAYS TO EARN MONEY THROUGH YOUR BLOG

    1. Pay Per Click Advertising.
    2. Affiliate links
    3. Advertising Widgets. …
    4. Advertising Space. …
    5. Affiliate marketing.

    If you would like me to go into more detail about the 5 ways above let me know in the comments section.

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    Life Coaching, The Pursuit of Happiness

    Why it’s okay not to have it all figured out, at any age.

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    Is it wrong to live in a Peter Pan society? Do we ever ‘grow up?’

    “The moment you doubt whether you can fly, you cease for ever to be able to do it.”

    I spoke to my friend recently who had just turned 30, “it’s weird” she said “when I was younger I assumed when I got to age 30, I would have my whole life together, figured out who I was, you know?”

    Age is a funny concept, almost like we define a particular age with an event. “I want to be married by 28” I hear a lot of people say. Do you? Why? Have you been told that this is what you’re supposed to do by society? You may even be single at the moment, the idea of thinking or knowing that’s what you will want when you get to that age or with that person (who you haven’t even met yet) is nonsensical and can cause so much pressure on us that we forget the most important thing, happiness. The universe may have different plans for you. And it’s important to trust the process and timing of your life.

    “If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.”

    Through each stage of our life requires us to show up in a different way, and everyone leads a different path.  Often we don’t even realise who we are meant to be – or what we are truly destined for – because we’re so busy trying to live out someone else’s idea of how our life should be or the societal pressures that creep up on us around the age of 25 – infact before that – probably the day you graduate.

    Have we become so busy buckling under the pressure of ‘age’ and set out systematic life plans that we forget to live in our own truth?

    This may sound quite gruesome, but age is subjective. Say someone passes away at 30 – their time is ‘cut short’. Someone who lives until their 40 does not have the same time on this beautiful planet as someone who dies at 70. Therefore, age is relative. a number doesn’t define your life path. Being older is an actual privilege, many people will never get to see 20 years old let alone 30. So do yourself a favour, and stop being so hard on yourself, no matter what age you are. Don’t compare your chapter 3 to someone else’s chapter 14. Do not let other people and their opinions hold power in defining your destiny.
    The key to truly becoming who are you are supposed to be and living the life that is best for you, is to surrender YOUR plans, dreams, and goals to your own truth. Do not let your life be shaped by societal pressures of where and who you are supposed to be at a certain age. You have one shot at this life, live in your own truth.

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    Blogging guide 101

    Learn from my mistakes: 10 things not to do when you graduate

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    1. Don’t freak out! You have literally just finished one of the most stressful and taxing times of your life. Relax, rest, recharge.

    2. Do not take any job (and salary) anyone throws at you. Stick to your dreams and goals. Don’t get side tracked.

    3. Do not give up! You will get rejections, you will spend hours filling out job applications, but keep searching! I got so many declines even from FREE internships, and then landed a very well paid job. Don’t give in!

    4. Don’t blow all your savings on celebrating – okay I’m not the fun police in fact I spent most of my time blowing my student loan (and overdraft) but the job market is HARD. Keep your savings so you don’t feel pressured to settle for any job.

    5. Don’t lose contact with your uni besties. So easy to do when you all go your separate ways. But make the effort.

    6. Don’t worry if you have to move home with your parents. This does not mean you are a failure, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

    7. Don’t slack in your internship. Yes you may be working for free just to get something on your CV. But an internship can be the gateway to your dream job. Work hard at your internship!

    8. Don’t forget to put an online portfolio together create content for your dream career if you haven’t already. No matter what you do these days chances are you’ll need a portfolio. Especially if you are a creative. Put a link in your CV to your online portfolio to help you stand out.

    9. Sign on to benefits if you have too – I know this one is quite taboo but I don’t give a shit. There is no shame in it if you have no money, struggle to find a job and need genuine help.

    10. Don’t be so hard on yourself. After your 5th rejection letter it’s easy to fall into a downward spiral, but honestly we’ve all been there. Nobody walks out of university and into their dream job. Just try your best and i promise it will all work out. Give it time.

    Life Coaching, The Pursuit of Happiness

    Self sabotaging in toxic relationships

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    I have been in many toxic relationships, and to be honest one of the main reasons they were toxic was because of me. I was toxic, I thought drama and arguments were love, partially due to my upbringing, partially due to my mental health at the time. I was attracted to men who were bad for me and who sparked that toxic fire in me. Like a tornado I went from one bad relationship to the next, burning as many bridges as I could and hurting myself and others whilst doing so, this constant cycle of – what I now recognise as self sabotage – became an addiction to me. Addicted to the poison that the toxicity gave me.

    Recognising my role in my toxic relationships has been a big turning point for me, turning the flash light on my self was painful but extremely enlightening. After all its easier to blame the other person isn’t it? It’s easier to blame my childhood or an absent father. But whilst the men were toxic too, I actively CHOSE them, I stuck with them, I let them poison me. I ignored the nice guys – the good guys – I always pushed them away – I self sabotaged my chance of happiness time after time. I used to think ‘nice guys’  were boring or I didn’t trust them, thinking there must be an ulterior motive. The truth is I wasn’t comfortable with steady and stable love. I didn’t understand it. I had never seen a healthy relationship and so associated instability and anger as passion and excitement.

    But like all bad habits, they are hard to break. I needed to work on myself and I am daily. I needed to smash through the toxic box I put love into. Break the patterns. Dig deep into my own state of mind. The first step I took was noticing the toxic patterns and taking ownership of my own actions. I am constantly evolving as a woman alone and in a relationship and let me tell you its taken a lot of work. But everything in life worth having takes work. Realising that I can grow in a relationship without burning it to the ground first – I have started to choose my battles wisely, not create them. Learnt to weather the storm, not create it. I know now that I have the power to stop myself from pouring the petrol on to the fire in my relationships.

    It’s time to say goodbye to my unhappily ever after and start living my happily ever after.